It's Raining, It's Pouring

Yes, we're still alive. But this is probably the worst storm we've seen since we've been here, and the eye is still 60 miles away. But the weather men keep changing their minds about what is really going on, so who knows. One minute it's going to be a hurricane, the next it's just a tropical storm. So we decided to act like intelligent people yesterday and went out to the beach.

As you can see, Paul was thrilled. We walked out on the sand as the red flags warned people not to swim (which of course they did anyway) and then the rain hit, so we had to hurry up and hide with all the other intelligent people under the pier. The waves weren't overly high, but the rain comes in horizontally, and the wind will pretty much rip an umbrella out of your hand. So we got soaked.

But it was pretty incredible to experience just how powerful the weather can be. I imagine a full blown hurricane would be awesome, until you got skewered by a flying palm tree. And I don't think we want that to happen, so we'll just be hiding in the bathtub from here on out.

The End of All Things

Captain’s Log, Stardate 2008-0819

We’re boarded up now, safe inside. The sky outside is dark, but a few clouds can be seen scattered about, distant scouts leading the way of the monstrous storm that is rapidly approaching. Becky and Paul are hiding in the bathtub as I write, their cheeks streaked with the liquid fear of impending devastation. I just got back from Walmart. It was hell on Earth. The shelves were stripped down to nothing, no bread, no Cup-O-Noodles, no Bumble Bee tuna. I saw a small child reach for the last pack of D batteries and a 300 pound woman tore his arm off at the shoulder and ate it. As the beaten down blue-vest wearing workers hastily pulled pallets from the back room, they were attacked like unfortunate gazelles wandering into a pool of ravenous piranha. I loaded the peanut butter and beef jerky into my cart, anything to get us through the days ahead, all the while dodging the rioters as they tore down displays of bottled water and Wheat Thins, rolling on the floor in fits of rage, overtaken by their quest for survival.

The hurricane is coming, and there’s no way out.

The schools are shut down, the streets are empty. The old man across the street is building a large boat out of hickory bark. Chester is buckled up tightly on the porch with a cat size life preserver. Families are gathered around their television sets as panicked weather men speak of our comrades to the south, already overtaken by Fay. When she gets here, she’ll be a Category I Hurricane. In 2004, the power in Jacksonville was out for nine days. This could very well be my last transmission.

Wait... I hear the thunder. It’s here.

Say Cheese

After having amassed an immovable amount of debt pursuing my own so-called dreams of being an arrogant, self-righteous attorney, dedicated to taking the innocent’s hard earned cash all in the name of upholding the law, I finally decided that maybe I should be a nice husband and let my wife have something for a change. I know, as she is fond of telling me, that it’s very rare that the money we spend is on something she wants. If she asks to go to SeaWorld for a fun filled family day, I say, “70 bucks!! Each?? Are you kidding?? Is that American dollars?? Uh, no.” But if I want an iPod, I say, “$240 doesn’t seem half bad, let’s go buy one today!” So she whines about all the things that I buy for myself while she is left wearing worn out shoes and a bathing suit from five years ago. But now… now I have something to hold over her head for at least the next seven years!

So we bought a new camera. And now Becky can continue on her journey to make Paul the most photographed child in all of Jacksonville, North Florida, and beyond! Of course as part of this deal she has to take 200 photos a day, enroll in night classes at Jacksonville University, and read 300 pages a night from some photography related literature.

But we all know it will pay off, as you can already see, Paul had his picture taken a few times this weekend. And who doesn’t love a picture of Paul?

NOTICE: This posting is an over-exaggerated version of the truth. The poster has never in his life overlooked an item his wife sought to purchase in order to buy an item for his own amusement. Neither is the poster’s wife wearing worn out shoes or a five year old bathing suit. In fact, on top of the new camera, said wife also recently purchased a new bathing suit. WHEREAS, the poster has also fully agreed to attend a fun filled family day in Disneyland or another acceptable venue as long as a third party is capable of coming to assist in the care taking of the poster’s son, hereinafter referred to as Paul, during said outing. Further, the terms hereinbefore laid out in this posting regarding said wife's requirements are a binding agreement, and any reader of this blog may bring an action to enforce said agreement upon said wife to produce a substantial amount of photos of PAUL each and every day. Let this be full notice to all parties present this 17th day of August, 2008.

Buy Paul Some Peanuts...

Since it's the last weekend of summer (for me anyway) we decided to catch one last baseball game. The season will be ending soon, so we thought we'd better eat one more hot dog and bag of peanuts. When we got downtown we immediately realized something was not quite right. There seemed to be a lot of people for just a Suns baseball game. So we asked one of the traffic directors what was going on and then found out that the game was conveniently starting at the same time that 13,000 people would be going into the next door arena to watch Bruce Springsteen. We almost turned around and left, but since we were "born in the USA" and enjoy baseball, we waited in the traffic. But of course the traffic made us late to the game, but also thankfully we were "born to run," so we rushed in and didn't miss much. We hurried across E Street (now I'm making things up) and sat in our seats to enjoy the last "glory days" of summer.

After the game, they lit off a pretty cool firework show, but Paul wasn't "dancing in the dark" to it. Mostly because he grew tired of the game after the first 30 minutes and preceded to try to run up the stairs to escape. But it was a good time, and the Suns won, so the home town crowd was happy. And they gave away four cars, but I didn't win. So now if I ever go to Philadelphia, I'll just have to walk the streets.

Ok, I'll stop.

Flying Beach Boy

Wouldn't you know, Paul wanted to go to the beach again tonight. But who can blame him? It was a beautiful night out in Jax Beach after a long day of heavy rain. We threw the football around again, and then decided to throw Paul around. We figured since he's taken swimming lessons, he should probably take flying lessons. (I would like his grandmothers to know that in trying to capture this picture I only dropped him almost once. I caught him by the leg just before he hit the sand. So no big deal. And he had a smile on his face the entire time.)

Other than that, he ran up and down the beach pointing at all the dogs and kites that people had brought out, and then played around in the sand a bit. But once again we had a good time, even though the summer is ending, as this is the last week before school starts.

The water seems to be getting a little colder too. Soon enough it will be winter again in Northeast Florida, which means the temperature will be unbelievably cold, like in the 60's. But for now, Paul is still enjoying the sand and surf of summer.

Monday Night Football

Hank Williams Jr. and all of his rowdy friends would be proud. Paul stepped out on the beach for some pig skin action... or more like cheap rubber $3 Target football action. Nothing gets Paul more excited than seeing all the colorful balls of all sizes when we go past the toy section in a store. So we got him this football to provide hours of entertainment and something new to chew on. It was a little late by the time we got to the beach, and the rain started to fall shortly after we got there, but he still had a good time as always.

And speaking of cheap entertainment for one year olds, who doesn't like chalk? For a buck and a half we got a whole bucket! Yeah... a whole bucket! And that's why Target is Paul's favorite store. And can you believe how smart this kid is? He's got his name down already, check it out:

Seriously, we didn't help him. He then used the chalk to map out a complex algorithm that he's been working on to be used in NASA's Costellation Program. I didn't really understand it.

Hannah-Not-Montana Park

We decided to stick it out in Jacksonville this weekend, since we're kind of tired of driving hours out of town to see broken down buildings and giant spiders. We decided there were still plenty of things to see around town anyway. So we went up to Hannah Park today, in the north east corner of town bordering the ocean and Mayport Naval Station. We'd been there once before, but when I saw that you had to pay to get in, I turned around and left. But today I coughed up the three dollars and it turned out to be worth it. It was pretty busy, but the park was enormous and there was actually a lot of parking for a change. First up, we hit the water park fountain area type thing. Whatever it was, Paul loved it.

Of course, that's easy to see, by the big goofy smile on his face. But you can't blame him on a day like today. It's been pretty hot and humid, but it is Florida.

After getting splashed for a while, we hit the beach. Paul did a fine job of covering himself in sand, as always, and I think he might have even gotten a little tan today. Other than that, it was a great day. Oh yeah, and he discovered how to take his diaper off all on his own, so we may have some fun days ahead. Great.