The National Blog Post

It was a beautiful fall day here in southern Maryland, and having it on a Sunday meant we all spent it together! We decided to take some cliche "Kid in the Fall Leaves" photos just for this blog. And these were a few that resulted:

When Paul is around, the serenity produced by a cool breeze drifting through the gold and amber leaves on an Autumn day can all too quickly be shattered by continous shrieks of nonsense.

Seriously, Mom and Dad. Seriously? First this silly hat, and now this? Really??

This one was taken specifically for Grandpa Bill.

But the lighting in the yard was not all that we had hoped for, so we decided to head north into the District to the National Arboretum. In D.C. they have the "National" version of everything. They have the National Zoo, the National Mall, the Nationals baseball team, the National Aquarium, the National Traffic Light, the National Parking Space, the National Restroom (including the National Toilet), and this national place for national trees and plants.

When they expanded the National Capitol Building way back in the day, they took down these national columns. Some lady fought for 30 years to have them moved here, and apparently she finally won. We should have worn togas and sat around them in deep thought.

Just a picture of the National Mother and Son... who of course is distracted as usual.

Big Kid definitely says it.

Nothing makes tree and plant watching a little more enjoyable than a nice sucker.

A sloppy Paul kiss for Dad.

We brought along the tripod to try some family shots, as you can see.

Getting this kid to hold still for two seconds is next to impossible. It takes bribes of sugar and threats of weeks in solitary confinement, but occasionally it works.

The sun was bright in this spot.

Yep, that would be Paulie Cheeseburger in true form.

Still brushing off the grass and the leaves.

Hold up, I gotta look cool for my photo.

So it was a great couple of days off, but it's back to work tomorrow! Hopefully the weather is this beautiful next weekend... when it's Halloween time!

The leaves never fell in Florida...

As I write this, Paul is dancing in the window in his underwear. It's just another day here. The leaves are dying off, turning to gold as they go. Becky raked the yard numerous times throughout the week, but as I look out now, I can hardly tell. It's been rainy the last two days, but before that, the warmth of summer was still alive and well. While I was riding in the back of a truck, the other two Maryland Sellers were playing in the yard. These photos were the result:


Is there anything more Fall than rolling in leaves? WARNING: All of our older readers (you know who you are) should not attempt to try this at home without medical personnel standing by.


October means baseball! Paul is gearing up for the World Series... either that, or preparing to whack his mother upside the head.


Here, throw me the ball and watch me drive this thing out of here! Future star left fielder for the, uh... Washington Nationals? Well, you never know.

The winter will be approaching soon and most likely the cold weather will be coming with it, but for now, it's Paul in the Fall.

Where did my time go?

Oh that's right, it went to work. And work is really affecting my ability to update this blog on a regular basis. I guess I need to quit, or take another four months off. Having to work in two back to back weeks is really too much. I just need to find a way to convince the banks that my student loans should be forgiven. Seriously, they could do it just this once. Right. Anyway, here are a few pics from the last few weeks for you all to catch up on.

One weekend (which feels like months ago) we went over to Shenandoah National Park to see the leaves changing color with the arrival of Fall. Incredibly marvelous! Paul was thrilled to walk through the woodlands and drive the twisting skyline highway.

Pause for picture time, Dad.

And then let's add Mom! Oh, and Frank Hot Dog is somewhere in there, but currently hidden from view.

Taking in the view of the rolling mountains along part of the Appalachian Trail.

This one... well, it pretty much says it. But they're missing a T. And please... don't picnick on my arm.

I will take it! I will take it! I will take the Ring to Mordor. Though... I do not know the way.

The tireless traveler!

I have more pics to share... hopefully sooner than later.

The Newest Edition

If you look up the definition, a new "edition" is probably a new version of the same thing. So technically, this would be considered a new "addition." Because, while we already have one noisy small person running around this house, this new one won't entirely be an exact copy of the old one, but a whole new screaming miniature person all its own. At least we hope it's not an exact copy, because then it would be a clone, and that would be pretty weird. Paul refers to himself as Paulie Cheeseburger, and now he's labeled the new baby in mom's belly as Frank Hot Dog. Yep, the first child is a very unique individual, and I'm positive the next one will be just as crazy. So here are the first official pictures of Frank Hot Dog:

In this one you can see the close resemblance to the baby's father, including large bald head slumped slightly forward.

Here, the baby appears to be in deep thought, or maybe just sleeping. Ok, I have no idea what the baby is doing. It's being a baby.

This one is a very clear shot of... well, nothing. Yeah, these sonogram photos aren't always the best. Hopefully they will show quite a bit more next time. But at least we can tell that there is in fact a small person in there, rather than a parasitic alien life form... which is a huge relief.

In the Words of Mason….

So I try not to imitate my brother’s blog by only posting when something depressing or irritating has happened in our lives, but today I have no choice. Thursday we had one of those days that my nephew Mason would have labeled as, “The worst day of my life.” His worst day ever was set off by having to go to JCPenny so I could buy a couple of shirts (I’m not sure where he wanted to go, but it wasn’t JCPenny), but he had at least three or four more worst days of his life after that while I was staying with them over the summer. But the “worst day of our lives” was set off by someone stealing the car the other day.

So the Unbehends donated this Dodge Intrepid to The Florida Sellers Foundation (hang tight and I’ll give you the information on how to make a donation yourself) and it served as the mode of cross-country transportation for our move to Maryland. Somehow after we moved here, I lost the radiator cap off of it, so I had stopped driving it and it had pretty much been sitting out there for the last two weeks. Well, I looked out the window the other day, and it was gone without a trace. I laughed about it. Yeah, it was kind of funny. They stole a car with no radiator cap. It would only take about 15 minutes before it was blowing smoke everywhere. Ha, that’s funny. Stupid thieves.

The police showed up and told us it was the second stolen vehicle that morning… on our street. Awesome. They called us the next morning at 6AM to tell us it had been found up in New Carrollton, a quaint little municipality on the northeast side of the city. Ok, we’ll drive up and get it released, no problem. Should just take a couple of hours. Little did I know I was venturing down the twisted staircase into the entrails of Hell.

The tow company wouldn’t give me the car without a release from the police… but they would gladly charge $50 a day to keep it for me. The police department wouldn’t give me the release because the name on the title was Unbehend. You need to drive 30 miles back to Waldorf and go to the DMV and pay to register your stolen car (which at this point we didn’t even know if it was worth the $88 to register). The DMV wouldn’t register it without proof of the lien being paid off, and the proof we had – the loan document with a giant stamp that said LIEN PAID – was not good enough.

Set my papers on the roof of the car so I can open the door. Wind blows my papers across the parking lot. Scream profanities into the now afternoon sky. Contemplate kicking in the door of the car. Lady in parking lot rolls up her window and looks the other way. Search for keys that are suddenly missing. Scream more profanities at my car. Drive back to house because even if they would have let me register, I had forgotten any form of payment. Drive back to the DMV, talk to the supervisor, get a receipt that shows the DMV now has the title and they are transferring it to my name. Drive the 30 miles back to the police station in New Carrollton, give them the form from the DMV.

We’re sorry, this isn’t good enough. You need to have the title for us to release it to you.

I brought the title earlier. The DMV now has it, because you told me to take it to them. Hear the ringing of the tow company cash register in my head. Ca-ching! Bill is now $300. Consider putting on my Terminator shades and telling lady at desk, “I’ll be back.” Talk to hard working police supervisor with joyful attitude and Dunkin Donuts Disorder. Convince him to give me the release, because I wasn’t leaving without it, at least not without a nightstick beating. Get a fax from Montana with a statement that I am authorized to remove the car. Get the release. Thank the clerk and skip merrily out of the station.

Drive to the ghetto. Walk up the stairs into the tow company house of horrors. Bring my self-defense weapon/car starter/flat head screw driver. Cringe as I pay the man. Drive to the ghetto car lot. Waive to the nice Latino fellows selling crack outside the nice car lot. Put coolant in the car and screw on the new cap. Use the screw driver to start it. Check out the brand new brick, tree branch, and phone bill the thief left me. Check that they took my CDs, but left Paul’s Word World DVD. Yeah, no need to learn to spell words in this part of town.

Bump out to Jay Z on the hip hop channel. Drive through rush hour traffic with my wife following behind. Sense the panic running through her as we get on the interstate with five million road raged DC residents. Turn on the heater, no hot air. See the gauge run up to red. Hear the motor rattle. Coast off the side of the road. Watch the cars fly by at 80 MPH. See the smoke shoot out of random places on the motor. Sit along side of the road. Get into the other car, smell the pleasant aroma wafting from Paul’s pants. Only going to be gone for an hour, no replacement pull-ups.

Call the car donation people to come take it away forever. They won’t tow it off the freeway. It’s illegal to tow a car off the freeway she tells me. So wouldn't you see thousands of broken down cars rotting along the freeway then? Right. Drive into a slightly less ghetto town. Call the tow truck. Follow the car home. Cringe as I pay the man again. Look at the dented, broken, leaking car sitting in front of the house. No longer laughing.

Awesome day. Anyone need a car? I’ll cut you a good deal. Still in great shape. Free brick and tree branch included.

The Big Brother

Oh no... I may have to share my wheels and my D??

Most of you already know, but I figured I'd better put it on the blog anyway, since this is the internet age. So sometime around April 15, 2010, Paul will discover the world of being a big brother! We finally got this one just about trained, and now we're starting over again. Now comes the name picking, the baby clothes shopping, the sleeping on a hospital couch, the crib, the swing, the high chair, the little socks, the little hats, the spit up rags, the screaming, the diaper messing, the long nights, and all the rest of the amazing things that come with it. Should increase the insanity around here just a little bit!! Wish us luck!

Seeing the Sights for Free

The nicest thing about D.C. is that most of the tourist attractions are free! The museums, monuments, and even the zoo is cost free to get into! This is incredible when compared to places like St. Augustine down in Florida, where to see a half eaten taco left by Ponce de Leon costs $15 per person. So while I’m on permanent vacation, we’ve been checking out a few things. We rode the Metro up to the zoo the other day to see the animals!


Unfortunately, a lot of the zoo was under construction, so many of the animals were absent without leave… probably wandering around the streets somewhere. But we did see a lion, a tiger, and a Panda Bear… oh my!

The Pandas are kind of a big thing at this zoo, and actually pretty cool to check out. Otherwise, we saw a few flamingos and other large birds, some monkeys, porcupines, a giant octopus, Mr. Crabs from the Sponge Bob show, a komodo dragon, an invisible gorilla and a vanishing hippo, a wallaby from down under, and a gang of fearless sparrows that attempted to loot our popcorn tub.

A couple of days after the zoo we took the Metro to Arlington National Cemetery. We’d been there before, but I really wanted to see the Iwo Jima statue this time because we missed it last time. Well… that didn’t work out. As it turns out, Arlington is massive, and the maps only come about every few miles as you walk around. So we watched the changing of the guard, saw where they just recently buried Ted Kennedy, and then walked, and walked, and walked some more trying to find the statue. Turns out, they call it the Marine Corps War Memorial, and we walked right past the sign that so easily pointed the way to it. Good job. At least we’ll know how to get there next time.